Wednesday, July 15, 2009

Took this quote from AI's blog, I love it!

"Couples experiencing infertility often receive well-meaning but extremely insensitive "advice." We can all list the most popular ones; "just relax and you'll get pregnant," or "adopt and you'll get pregnant," or "why can't you just be happy with what you have," or the most painful from the ones who seem to have the good on God's plan; "maybe God never meant for you to have children." The sheer audacity of making a statement like that never ceases to amaze me. These same people would never walk up to someone with cancer and say, "maybe God never meant for you to live." However since I am infertile, I am supposed to get on with my life.It is hard to understand why people cannot see infertility for what it is: a disease for which I have the right to seek treatment. What if doctors said to the parents of polio victims, "Maybe God meant for thousands of children to be cripples, live in iron lungs or die." What if they never tried to find a cure? Who could think for one minute that was God's plan?Why do I think God gave me infertility? I think he meant for my husband and I to grow closer, become stronger, love deeper. I think God meant for us to find the fortitude within ourselves to get up each time infertility knocks us down. I think God meant for our medical community to discover medicines, invent medical equipment, and to create procedures and protocols. I think God meant for us to find a cure for infertility. No, God never meant for me NOT to have children. That is not my destiny, that is just a fork in the road I am on. I have been placed on the road less traveled, and like it or not, I am a better person for it. Clearly, God meant for me to develop more compassion, deeper courage, and have greater inner strength on this journey to resolution and I haven't let him down.Frankly, if the truth be known, I think God singled me out for special treatment. I think God meant for me to build a thirst for a child so strong and deep that when the baby is finally placed in my arms, it will be the longest, coolest most refreshing drink I have ever known. While I would never have chosen infertility, I cannot deny that a fertile woman could never experience the joy that I know awaits me. Yes, one way or another, I will have a baby of my own. And, the next time someone wants to offer me unsolicited advice, I'll say, "Don't tell me what God meant when he handed me infertility, I already know." ~Anon.

5 comments:

katemonster said...

I think that God meant for us, as well, to learn from you and Mike. For me, especially, to learn from the love that I see you both exemplify on a daily basis. I believe that you and Mike are making the right decisions and I believe that you have been placed on this path because you are the best of us; you are the best to teach us that being parents means to love unconditionally even before we are blessed enough to have the miracle in our arms. You are the best and the brightest of what it means to be a parent, sis, and this is only the beginning of your journey <3

Ginny said...

Thank you for posting this.

HelloKitty said...

Thanks Katie! I love you!

And you're welcome Ginny! It just feels so true!

Jenny said...

I couldn't agree more! For 15 long long months I thought I was infertil. It was so hard to hear other people's comments on it (that's why we only told 2 people that we were trying). No one knows what it's like unless they have been thru it themselves. I know their words are ment to be kind, but when your on the other end it can seem like a slap in the face. I couldn't agree more with you either on the fact that we will be even more greatful when we do get our little one. I never felt such joy as I did the day I found out I was finally pregnant and I know you'll someday to feel that same joy! Don't ever give up, your little angel will make it's way to you!

HelloKitty said...

Oh Jenny, you are so awesome, and thank you for your words! I am so happy for you!