James 1:12

Blessed is the man who perseveres under trial; because when he has stood the test, he will receive the crown of life which the Lord has promised to those who love Him.

10 months

Today marks 10 months of TTC. I think I'm going to celebrate with a whole bottle of wine. Kidding. I'm kinda ok. A little depressed, but ok.

Beautiful Lauren

Since I'm trying to keep my mind off of appointments and TTC, I decided to work on my portfolio for work. I need more pictures of hair and makeup, so I had a photoshoot with my cousin today and I got to take all of the pictures with my new camera. It was so much fun and I can't wait to do my next one!





Thanks Lauren!

Thoughts of O running thru my head

CD 32 with no O yet. Who am I kidding "yet"? O never comes. Still waiting till May 4th for my results from my GTT. I hate all the waiting. All this stupid waiting is not helping. Can't they just give me something to O? Why do we have to wait in the meantime? I just don't understand why this has to be so hard. I hate taking OPKs everyday just always to be let down. But I'm scared if I miss a day, and not take one, I'll miss it. Sorry, just rambling on here.

I text my cousin today, and she said my uncle is mentally with it, and has a good sense of humor. He's on antibiotics for an infection and they are running more tests on him. Please keep him in your prayers!

I'm working tomorrow on my portfolio for work with one of my other cousins, and I'm so excited! I'll post pics of how that turns out.

...just trying to keep busy

Prayer request.

My post today is to ask for prayers.

Please pray for my family. My uncle is very sick and needs prayers. If you know my family, you'll know how tight knit we are. I think of all of my uncles and aunts as like other parents, and it kills me inside that one of them is hurting. I ask the Lord for a miracle, and that he may make a full recovery. I also pray for his immediate family. His wife. His daughter. His son and daughter in law. Please Lord be with them and comfort them.

My second prayer request is for my TTC BFF who just found out she's pregnant! I am so happy for her, and when I got her email today I cried tears of joy for her! I ask the Lord to keep her and her new baby bean safe, healthy and happy for these next 9 months. I pray for her and her DH and I ask the Lord to bless them through this most wonderful time in their lives.

Thank you in advance to all who offer up prayers for these 2 important people in my life.

Just for giggles

This is what my family and I do when we get together...this was at our condo's in Puerto Vallarta in Janurary

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cf4hNAal2ko

GTT Day

I had my GTT today and it went as well as expected. We got there at 8:30 am, and had my blood drawn as soon as we got in (right arm). Right after I had the first round of blood drawn, I had to drink a bottle of that sugar water stuff. That was the part I was scared of. I took a sip and it wasn't too bad, kinda tasted like flat Sprite or 7up, but a little sweeter. "Hmm." I thought. "I was scared for nothing." I continued to drink it, since the lady said I had to chug it. The more swallows I took, the worse it got. It was soooo sugary and towards the middle started tasting like I was drinking straight syrup. Yuck. I finally finished it after gagging a few hundred times, while Mike was standing behind me laughing. I felt ok though, didn't throw up!

Mike left to go home to do some stuff before he had to go to work later in the day (he took a late day so that he could take me and pick me up, he's so sweet.) So there I sat with a new Nicholas Sparks book I had just bought at my favorite thrift store for 99 cents. (hmm I just realised there is no key on the keyboard for the cent symbol)

I started reading and got about 3 chapters in, and I was starting to feel kinda yucky. Finally it was time to go back in...another blood draw, left arm this time. At least I didn't have to drink that stuff anymore. But mind you I had been fasting since 10:00 last night, so all I had in my stomach was that yucky drink. So I hang out for another hour and get blood drawn again (right arm).....and hang out another hour and get blood drawn for the last time (left arm).

Mike was there to pick me up, cookies and orange juice in hand in case I felt "woozy". I love my husband he is so sweet! All the nurses gushed about that and said he was a keeper...I think so too.

By now (10:26pm) I have the worst acid refulx/heart burn ever, and I know it's from that sugar drink...blech everytime I think about it I get the shivers. Also I would like to point out that from all the stabbing, I now look like an intravenous drug user (lovely)

I don't go back to see my gyno till the first monday in May, so won't know any results till then. Also just for noting, another negative OPK today.

It's past 10:45pm

...and now I fast. No food or water till after my GTT is done tomorrow, sometime around 12 pm.
They told me to bring a snack for right after the last bloodwork has been drawn, as I'll probably be pretty woozy. I hate needles, yuck. Not looking forward to tomorrow and being stabbed 3 times!

CD 21

I just finished day 2 of my 3 days special diet for my GTT on thursday. Seriousley, I think the only hard part of this "diet" is that you have to eat ALOT. My dinners are huge and then you have to eat dessert on top of that! lol Not that I'm really complaining.

I've been reading up more on what to expect for the GTT and I'm kinda scared. I've read and heard the sugar water stuff they make you drink is positively vile, and alot of people throw up... my tummy's feeling queasy just thinking about it. At least Mike's gonna go and keep me company for the 3 hours I have to be there.

I took today off and I was gonna just hang out outside, get a tan and paint cuz I just needed some "me" time. I ended up having to take Harley to the vet because he's been super itchy and his skin is so pink! It turns out maltese's are prone to skin allergies and thats probably what he has. Something to do with the pollen in the air right now. So we spent a good hour there while they ran tests on skin cultures for him. He's gotta be on 2 medications for it for a week, one being a steroid, yikes! I really need to find a new vet tho, just for an office visit, a skin scrape, and meds I walked out of there paying almost $200! Jeesh!

I did end up getting some painting in. It was fun, I haven't painted in what feels like forever! But I broke out my easle and all my paints and went to town! I really need to paint more though cuz whenever I'm ready to transfer I'm gonna need some sort of a recent portfolio to get into an art school.

I'm CD 21 w/ no pos. OPKs...but I'm still testing EVERY single day just to be sure! I really want to know when or if I O. The mailman dropped off my package of 100 opks today so I'm good to go.......... what? I was running low! ok ok it's an addiction, but it's all I can do!

Eat Eat Eat

Tomorrow I start day one of the "special" diet I have to be on for 3 days for my GTT on thursday. It's really not a diet per-say, more like they need you to eat alot of food and get enough calories in to see how your body processes sugar. Hmmm, 3 days of eating lots of good food...easiest diet I've ever been on! I think the hard part for me will be eating big breakfasts, as I never eat anything in the morning. For some reason when I do, I just end up feeling sick, but I'll get over it. I'm scared of the day of the test too, I have to fast 10 hours before, come in, down a huge thing of sugary water stuff in 5 minutes (blech), wait an hour, get my blood drawn, and then repeat two more times. I'd better bring a book.

Just as I thought...

Those twinges didn't mean ANYTHING. It's not sunday and still not a single positive OPK!

2 things...

1) I really NEED to change this song on my blog, it's starting to drive me crazy!

2) I've been having some twinges in my ovaries some yesterday and a little more today (more in my right one, but I can feel it in both). I realy hope that I'm about to O, yet all of my OPKs so far have been negative.........oooh just now having more twinges on my right one. Please please please I want to O!

I think I' going to pray extra hard that the Easter bunny brings me lots of eggs this year ha-ha

Back from the Dr...

...and all of my tests, my u/s and my bloodwork, were normal, which like my Dr. said, is good that they're normal, but bad because now we still don't know why I'm not O'ing.

She also said that I still may have PCOS even though the u/s and bw were normal, so she ordered a 3 hour GTT (Glucose test) and so I do that next thursday, which doesn't sound like alot of fun. I have to be on a special diet for 3 days prior to the test and then fast that day of the test and have to stay there for 3 hours getting blood drawn every hour. She said depending how those results come back, I'll probably be put on Metformin.

I totally did have a little breakdown in her office too, I couldn't help it, I'm just sooo frustrated with my body! We have been TTC for over 9 months now and as far as I know in those whole 9 months I haven't ovulated at all!!! I just feel broken inside. I just want to ovulate at least once!! Sorry, my update turned into a little vent. Just feeling really down on myself today.