So sooo sorry to have gone MIA!

I have just been so soo busy and overwhelmed with being a new mom!

I will write a real birth story later but to just give a quick rundown, I was in labor for 19 hours, and even though I had an epidural I had the most intense back labor. He was too big for my pelvic structure and was sunny side up, so at one point they started bringing up that I would probably have to have a C-section since I had gotten to 10cm but he wouldn't move past a -2 station. They wanted me to labor down but said they would only give us 2 hours, well when nurses left the room even though I don't think I should have I tried pushing during contractions w/o anyone knowing lol, well I think it helped a litte bit and my nurse let me "try" to push when she came back later...after pushing for 2 hours and my Dr literally running in telling me to stop pushing right as I pushed out the middle of his head (and holy cow I knew birth was painful but o.m.g!) Jackson Carter was born at 2:59am on feb 21st weighing 8lbs15oz, just one oz shy of a 9 pounder and was 21 and a half inches long. I had a 2nd degree tear trying to push him out so that got stiched up which was loads of fun (and still is ) but it as all so so worth it.

We are SO in love with our little man.

Today I meet my Miracle...

"This is the day the Lord has made, let us rejoice and be glad in it." ~Psalm 118:24

This day has finally come...

The day I feel like I have waited my entire life for....

I am consumed by so many different emotions, and even though today is the day our lives change forever, for the better, it still does not seem real. I sit here in the dark. In the quiet of my home and reflect back on the past almost 3 years now of waiting for this miracle to enter our lives. This sweet, wonderful, tiny miracle created by the hand of God. My miracle!

This is the child that we have longed for....the child we prayed for and begged and pleaded for....the one we dreamed about over and over...the one we cried for and fought for....the one I have loved for almost the past 3 years of my life, even before he existed... and I am about to meet him face to face. My miracle that has been in the making for so long is finally made and is finally ready to enter my reality.

Today I will speak silently to God, prayers of thanks always on my lips and in my heart. I will sit here alone in the dark for a short while and feel my son kicking from within and cherish these last few moments in solitude of my miracle pregnancy before we are swept into a whirlwind of chaos and overwhelming emotion. I will remember everything we have been through to get to this exact moment in life and I will be thankful for the rest of my days that this is how our story ends...with a beautiful new beginning.

Well...

I'm back from my OB appt.

Our Ultrasound went well, but he's still measuring really big, today they are guessing he's about 8.7 After our u/s we went next door for our OB appt and got checked and I'm 80% effaced (which is awesome) but still under 2cm dialated and she said he's pretty high still. So high in fact that she actually tried to strip my membranes while checking me and she said she could barely reach and maybe did it a tiny bit but just couldn't get it because he hasn't come down any because he's so big.

Sooooo she said her profesional opinion is that if we don't go into labor by friday she would like us to come to the hospital Sunday for an induction!

I am feling so many emotions...scared, excited, happy and unsure I think are the top few. Knowing that for sure by Monday we will have him here in our arms is a crazy feeling. She is afraid with the rate he's growing if we wait he's not going to come down and just get even bigger and then my risk for a C-section will be even greater. So for sure if he's not coming on his own, he will be here either very late sunday 2/20/11 or monday 2/21/11.wow.

OB appt Dialating!

I had my OB appt today and got checked for the first time...yowza! That wasn't the most fun thing in the world lol but not too bad. But I am 1cm almost 2cm dialated and very thin and she said she could feel his head! (which made me cry lol) I'm pretty sure I lost part of my plug this morning too when I went to the potty.

Hopefully I will have progressed by my next appt next week!